They Told Her To Dress For The Clubs

As a card player, she took that too literally. (Her dress was completely out of hand!)

Vintage Postcard Of A Woman In A Club Costume

Via DPopTart.

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Las Vegas Dreams Of Yesteryear

I spend time dreaming of being in Las Vegas back in it’s heyday… Not that Vegas isn’t fun now. But there’s something more cool and glam about Vegas back in the day. It’s for that romantic reason that I collect vintage Las Vegas stuff — not the “good” expensive stuff, like vintage casino chips or big ticket and big space-taking items like signs, but old booklets & brochures, advertising stuff, coupons, and other ephemera.

Vintage Airways Las Vegas Booklet

The old paper has more than cool graphics, but, as it was held in the sweaty hands of some excited traveling gambler, it’s absorbed the hopes, fears, and anticipation of some other person…

That person was feeling all the things I feel today — only they were probably dressed far nicer. *wistful sigh* And they had their own individual problems, hopes, plans… They certainly saw different shows (as this schedule from 1967 shows). But we are united across the decades by our desire to beat the odds. At more than the gaming tables too, I bet.

May 1, 1967 Vegas Show Sheet From Airways

Vintage Las Vegas Map From Airways Brochure

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No Dinner Dates — Instead, Date While Gambling

One of Richard Jeni’s dating skits, which includes his theory that dates should not be held at a dinner table — but at a poker table.

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Dating Disappointments

January Jones Times Magazine by Lorenzo Agius, March 5th 2011

If this is how January Jones feels, the rest of us echo her thoughts. She has our sympathies. And, in the misery loves company sort-of-a-way, we rejoice in our shared experiences.

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Other Ways Vegas Tries To Take Your Money

The free booze and party mentality might make you overlook a few things when in Las Vegas, so let me open your eyes to a few things to help you save more of your money — so you can lose it in the casinos, where it belongs. *wink*

Most ATMs inside the casinos charge you big fees — on top of whatever your bank already charges. I recall one machine asking me to agree to a $5 charge! It seems crazy for them to charge me so much for money I’m just going to turn over to them anyway… It just shortens the time I can play. My advice: Bring plenty of cash and, when you need more, head away from the Strip to find a cash machine. (This is also quite often true of the ATMs at your local casino as well.)

In-room Internet charges are often ridiculously expensive. Personally, I’ve never even thought of bringing a laptop along on a weekend gambling trip, but many people do. If you’re one of those who can’t make do a few days without your Internet access (or can’t make do with your phone apps), Vegas Chatter has some free WiFi location options.

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Of The Deflowered Girl At The Seance

The Recently Deflowered Girl: The Right Thing to Say on Every Dubious Occasion, illustrated by Edward Gorey Via Silent Porn Star (NWS).

The Recently Deflowered Girl: Deflowerment At Seance

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Bad Changes In Las Vegas

There have been two big changes in Las Vegas since my first trip there… And I don’t particularly care for either of them.

First of all, the food used to be incredibly cheap in Vegas. Not quite as fab as free drinks, but pretty darn close… Especially the all-you-can-eat buffets. Now, food had become much more expensive — making me far less inclined to leave the tables and at properly. Perhaps that’s the goal. But it only makes me head upstairs to lay down for a bit and then go eat; a much longer leave than had I just left to eat like a regular human.

I still highly recommend the classic buffet at the Flamingo. But there’s still plenty of other nationwide restaurant and fast food options outside the casino doors. Which, if you’re listening, casinos, only takes me further away from the gambling. So bring back the cheaper food, will ya?

The other irritating thing that’s changed in Vegas over the years is the “family friendly” BS. Who on earth thought it was a good idea for kids to come along to Las Vegas?

Sure, there’s other stuff to see and do there, but why incorporate things for children inside casino hotels? The kids can’t be in the casinos, adults don’t want them there — or at the buffets, either. Vegas was once a getaway for grown-ups and now there’s too-much of a focus on entertaining children.

I kinda feel sorry for the parents who have kids along, what with their changing shifts at the tables to trade off child care duties or must pay the incredible fees for on site daycare for their kids so that the adults can be together in the casinos and night clubs. But then I remember those parents are the idiots who brought their children along, kidding themselves it would be fun — and who are stupid enough to entrust their children to day care centers and staff they don’t know.

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Looking Up In Vegas

Burlesque Performer Nejla Ates with Tree on Her Head

When I spotted this photo of burlesque dancer Nejla Ates and her fiance over at Vintage Gal, I once again wondered why show girls in Las Vegas have such huge headdresses…

 

You’d think it would be counter-productive — if not a complete waste of time — to try to get an audience to look up at the tree, the fan of feathers, etc. on top of a partially nude dancer’s head.

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Everybody’s A Relationship Critic

Someone shelved the Dr. Phil’s weight loss book on the “Romance” book shelf at the thrift store. Can’t tell you how hard that makes me laugh!

Advice For Dr. Phil: You're Fiction!

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Casino Fashions: Dressing Up To The Nines

One of the things we dames love most about casinos, even our local casinos, is the ability to suspend time…

It’s not just the way you can get sucked into pulling the slots until you can’t feel your arm (or is that just the drinks?), how you and your friends just realize you haven’t eaten in 8 hours — and you still don’t want to do anything about it (that might be the drinks too), or how even people-watching can be hours of dedicated sport. All those things are fab, but the one thing that sucks us into the world of casinos is the glamour.

Vintage Casino Glamour

Here, finally, a vestige of yesteryear’s world of dressing for the occasion. Hardly does anyone dress for dinner or any sort of entertainment anymore, and we girls miss it. But at the casinos, the magic still exists.

Even if dressing up isn’t de riguer, you aren’t out of place when you do it. Especially at night.

It’s the chance to dress to the nines, wear those fashions you feel you have nowhere else to wear… Your favorite vintage dress, rhinestones in the daytime, a floaty chiffon peignoir poolside, that little black dress…

However, a dame doesn’t dress desperate or slutty. She doesn’t ever wear anything she wouldn’t be caught dead in — or want to have forever preserved in photographs or the photographic memories of her friends who will mercilessly remind her of her fashion faux pas.

Here are some of my basic dos and don’ts for what to wear to casinos:

Do not dress like a prostitute. Prostitution may be legal in Nevada; but it’s not in Vegas and casinos, ever zealously protecting their licenses, will walk you out the door if you look too much like one. (This also means you shouldn’t role play any hooker scenarios with your husband or joke about solicitation inside casinos — casino security is notoriously unromantic and sans a sense of humor.)

Do dress for comfort. Don’t pay the ultimate price for beauty by being miserable and unable to enjoy yourself. Look good enough to eat — but make sure there’s enough room for you to sit comfortably as well as enjoy your meal, time at the tables, taking in a show, etc.

The same comfort rule applies for shoes too. New, never worn shoes, or those so high or uncomfortable for any reason that they make your feet hurt are rather ridiculous to wear on vacation or to a special event, but they severely reduce your fun. Casinos are huge — and in Las Vegas, the whole spread is so huge — that you’ll find yourself doing a lot of walking. Even at your local little casino, you might be surprised by how much standing and walking you might have to do. Besides, painful feet can and will distract you from your game play. Don’t hobble yourself, your fun, and the fun of your friends by wearing (or only bringing along) uncomfortable shows.

Best Bets In Casino Fashions

Don’t skip the foundation garments — especially if you’re going to dare to bare that cleavage etc. Even if it’s some sort of strategy to distract your opponents (a whole other issue, really), it’s been my experience that the folks really distracted by bare bouncing jiggle bits on display is the girl unable to feel certain that what she shows isn’t under control. Especially when she leans in to toss the dice.

Do wear (or, if traveling, pack) more then sexy skirts and dresses. Yes, I encourage you to wear those sexy dresses and skirts to dinners, clubs, and shows, but don’t forget jeans and pants too. Because for many of us there’s nothing more painful and distracting (except, perhaps, tight shoes), than sitting for hours on end keeping your legs properly crossed or your knees together while sitting on bar stools and at gaming table chairs.

Do wear something with pockets — and skip the fancy purse when gambling. It’s too easy to leave the purse behind or let it get picked when it’s unminded, so when planning a long stay at the tables, keep your essentials (ID, keys, etc.) in your pockets. And when you do bring along a purse, be sure to keep it safe and tended to.

Do keep the location of the casino in mind when selecting what to wear. Generally speaking, casinos in the US are far more casual than in Europe and other overseas locations. That doesn’t mean that being in a US casino forces you to be so casual, but be prepared to stand out — or even looking like a vintage cliche — when you dress up.  (We dames don’t mind, but if you don’t want the attention, keep it casual.)

In Las Vegas, you know it will be hot — but air conditioning is everywhere, so if you opt for that sundress, be sure to bring a wrap or sweater — especially if you chill easily.

You should also know that while many casinos do not have dress codes themselves, many of the night clubs do. Also, some casinos in Atlantic City, for example, have dress codes for specific areas and times (usually late at night); know before you go.

When you wear what suits you, the location, and the situation, I’m betting you’ll have a much better time.

Image credits: Vintage Floral Damask Dress with Matching Jacket, Belt and Purse via Buffalo Gal Vintage.

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